Feeling Sorry For Myself Dot 'Blog-Break' Dot Com.

I have not been in the mood to write lately..It's not fun when you are angry with yourself but it gets worse when you are 'feeling sorry for yourself' tooo!!! You just don't feel like doing anything!!!  basically here's whats up....


I recently decided to do the one thing I have dreamt about for years - Take a Masters Degree in Fashion - Fashion???? YES! Fashion....!!! As ridiculous as it sounds to most people around me its a desire I have had for so long but never addressed as 'Fashion' as we know it (and in the Nigerian sense) had been seen as a vocation rather than a respectable career path.

Asides the cheeky and derogatory comments I often get when I express my desire to study fashion, truth is I should have fought my corner and followed my heart so rather than blame anyone, I take full responsibility for not fully embracing my path sooner. Growing up, I was what many described as a "Brainy" child always one of the top 3 students. A school report card described me as "very academic and unwittingly intelligent" (I'm still not sure exactly what that means) but I inevitably found myself chasing the ideals of a somewhat 'professional' career path expected of someone with 'unwitting intelligence'. I didn't mind being a Doctor like my parents prescribed but as fate would have it I ended up graduating with a joint degree in IT & Business while fashion remained my consistent and faithful sidekick..

Although I'm proud of my achievements working as a fashion/art director and stylist for 12 years, I wonder if I could have done more if  I had given it my all. Fortunately though, I have been doing a lot of soul searching and lifestyle re-working.Thank God for the freedom and perks of being an adult. I call the shots in my life these days and I have been following my heart and  'fashion' dreams more. ToTe Collections was born along the way and running with my new found freedom, I applied for a Postgraduate Degree in Fashion (for real o..."Back to school with Bata Cortina"LOL!) but sadly though, I apparently applied a bit too late and the course is fully booked for this year..!!!! (Shooot! Looks like everyone has been soul searching tooo..)

I was informed that I have to wait till next year. One whole year??? Wait for one whole year??? Oh well I have waited this long I guess ??? What's one more year right? it's just all of 12 months of waiting that's all!!!  Hmmm, I'm officially and utterly upset with myself!!!! Why? Oh why didn't I apply sooner???? Aaaaaaaah!!! (screaming in Queens english, yoruba and pidgin toooo....!!!). I grab a tissue and sob uncontrollably....(aaaaahhhhh!!!! yeeeeee!!!! aaaaahhh!!!)

 Meanwhile, there is one thing you can do to cheer me up sha..LOL! I was nominated along sides some fashion biggies I truly respect for the Eloy awards Accessory Designer of the Year award. Please give me half a chance of  winning by voting for me here.. Thank you..:)

Anyway peeps, please forgive me while I take a "Feeling-Sorry-For-Myself-Blog-Break" one thing is for sure though, I will snap out of it, I will survive and I will be back....*wink!!! (grabs yet another tissue to catch a rolling teardrop....aaaaahh!!!) Hee! Heee! (I'm laughing at the same time....this is really weird!)

Have a fabulous tissue-free day, peeps !

Lots of Love,

B.

PS: If you're still wondering whether to do that one thing you've always dreamed of, I'm not an expert yet but all I can say is "We all only get to live once" ....You must make that decision for yourself to live the life you truly want..! Be strong and be of good courage - Yes You Can!!!